My uncle Frankie was the joke teller on Dad's side of the family. I'm going to warn you right now, I use the word Asshole, so if that offends you, don't read this. Uncle Frankie told the long, rambling joke when I was about ten years old, and for some reason I didn't hear the punchline. I told this joke for years, warning my audience it was joke only. About ten years ago, I learned it wasn't a joke, really. It was a story with a moral.
One day some of the Body's Parts began thinking they needed a King. The Brain said, "I should be the King because I'm smart." The Heart said, "No, I should be the King because I'm so strong." "You are both wrong," shouted the Skin. "I'm the biggest!" Soon all the Body Parts were arguing who should be the King, when the Asshole chirped, "I want to be King."
You could have heard a gallstone drop while the Body Parts stared in disbelief at the Asshole. "You can't be King," they all said in disgust. "You're an Asshole." They all ignored him as they started arguing again.
As you can imagine, the Asshole was very hurt. He sat in the corner and pouted instead of doing his job.
Very soon, the Brain became sluggish, the Heart felt funny, the Skin was clammy. One by one, the other Body Parts began to fill really bad, but the Asshole wasn't budging. Finally, all the Body Parts begged the Asshole to be King, and so it was.
The moral of the story is: Any Asshole can be King.
One day some of the Body's Parts began thinking they needed a King. The Brain said, "I should be the King because I'm smart." The Heart said, "No, I should be the King because I'm so strong." "You are both wrong," shouted the Skin. "I'm the biggest!" Soon all the Body Parts were arguing who should be the King, when the Asshole chirped, "I want to be King."
You could have heard a gallstone drop while the Body Parts stared in disbelief at the Asshole. "You can't be King," they all said in disgust. "You're an Asshole." They all ignored him as they started arguing again.
As you can imagine, the Asshole was very hurt. He sat in the corner and pouted instead of doing his job.
Very soon, the Brain became sluggish, the Heart felt funny, the Skin was clammy. One by one, the other Body Parts began to fill really bad, but the Asshole wasn't budging. Finally, all the Body Parts begged the Asshole to be King, and so it was.
The moral of the story is: Any Asshole can be King.
Now, you may wonder why I picked this joke to share with you. It's not because of the moral. It's my way of underscoring the importance of digestion, start to finish. You know, that little Monster I have been fighting. Eating well. Good health starts with what we put in our mouths, continues with what our body gets out of it, and ends, when all is well with a smooth exit. So sayeth Captain Obvious |